It’s my birthday today and I can’t think of a much better gift for me than getting to spend some time with my Mom, bringing her to a doctor appointment. I haven’t been in her apartment since the lockdown started in March, so I’ll take what I can get.
She’s 93 and often forgets birthdays now, so I was prepared to remind her when I saw her (something on the order of “Guess what you were doing 62 years ago today?). I should have known better – she came prepared with a sweet card written out in her shaky hand. What a treasure!
Some of you who are older know how poignant it is when your parents get old and start to lean on you for strength. When I look at my mom, I still see her as the woman who gave birth to me, who raised me, who took care of me when I was sick, who taught me how to play the piano, who shared her love of reading and music with me…
Her eye doctor was running behind, so while we waited in his office, I played videos from the past 5 years or so on my phone for her. I played the lullaby for her that I had just recorded for our granddaughter and tears sprang to her eyes. I found old videos of her playing a duet with my sister (Mom on the piano, sister on the flute), a video of my two sisters and me singing a trio for Christmas a few years ago, some videos of my mom playing the piano beautifully at a memorial for her sister. I even brought the photo album of my growing up years that she had made and we looked through that together, too. When the doctor finally came in, he was exceedingly apologetic for keeping us waiting for so long, but he needn’t have been. We were soaking up the time together – time that we’re not allowed to have in her apartment anymore.
It was snowing heavily when we left the doctor’s office and I was privately a little nervous about driving in it, but didn’t want to make Mom nervous with those kinds of thoughts. She may have guessed it, because she said, “I always know I’m safe when I’m with you, Lynn.”
You never stop needing your mother and that’s the truth.
We listened to the National Lutheran Choir singing beautiful hymns on the way back to her place. I could tell that she was feeling lonely and somehow unsafe, so when we got back I prayed for her before we got out of the car.
As we made our way up to the front door, we heard the distinctive call of a blue jay almost right overhead.
“Mom, do you hear that blue jay?”
“Oh, is that what that is? I can hear it but I didn’t know what it was.”
“Yes, it’s a blue jay and it must be right near us. I wish we could see it!”
She lifted up her eyes toward the sound with a smile and said good-naturedly to the bird, “Thank you!”
I snuck in a hug and we said goodbye. And now I lift up my eyes to the Maker of the Blue Jay and say, “Thank you!”
It was a good day.
I’ll probably delete this in the morning…
Lynniebeemuseoday 
Another really nice post. I hope your kids are reading along.You know, you have the makings of a mighty fine book here. Throw in your vacation writings and all the photos.I wonder if there is a way to put it up on a print-on-demand website?
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Thank you, Karl! I’d actually r really interested in doing something like that. I’ve been checking into sites like Blog2Book. It’s kind of expensive per book, though, so I’m not sure how practical it would be. But I appreciate your vote of confidence. I’ll let you know if I find anything interesting out about options.
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Maybe this site? Must be a catch because it sounds too good to be true. “How much does it cost to use Lulu.com? For authors, creating a book and offering it for sale in the Lulu bookstore doesn’t cost anything. The only costs are when you purchase an item!”
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I’ll check it out. Thanks!!
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