Wednesday, May 4, 2022 Shy

My mother liked to tell the story about taking me to the drugstore when I was perhaps three years old. In my mom’s words, “The clerk talked to her without much response. She’d just look. Finally, when she’d been asked a direct question and still just stared, I urged, ‘Well, say something.’ She reached for my hand, and thus fortified, murmured respectfully and shyly, ‘Something.’”

Those were the days when you could still describe someone as being shy and it was a description, not a condemnation. Somewhere along the line, that word began to smack of being a character flaw, so it became the more acceptable word, “reserved.” I’m not shy, just reserved.

And then later still, the whole introvert vs extrovert thing came along. Oh how I used to envy those natural extroverts in my life (you know who you are). What I wouldn’t have given to feel at ease in a group, always equipped with the right thing to say instead of being frozen into silence. But now, people are eager to identify as introverts, so that worked out pretty well for me.

I think it was the experience of being in college that taught me how to be less awkward around people. I realized that even if I was feeling unbearable shy, I could overcome that and find my inner “extrovert,” so to speak. We’re all just combinations of those things anyway, depending on the circumstances, don’t you think? Sometimes I’m cheerfully expansive and able to handle any and all social situations. Sometimes I’d rather withdraw into my shell and let everyone else do the hard work of socializing.

I’ve heard it said that both introverts and extroverts can go to a social gathering and really enjoy it. The difference is in how they feel afterward. The introverts are drained and need to recover (this is me). The extroverts are energized and ready for more.

That’s all I’ve got to say on the subject. But I’d love to hear what you have to say about it!

I might have to delete this post unless I’m recovering from a social gathering and don’t have the energy.