(Don’t be discouraged about all the boring stuff about Scivener. An actual story lurks below! This marks the first time I’ve started a blog post with a parenthetical statement. I’m so proud.)

I’ve finally gotten sufficiently interested in my fiction writing endeavors that I purchased the Scrivener app for my iPad. (Inwardly, I pronounce this as “Scriv-nuh,” kind of like one might say “Guv’nuh” instead of “governor” if one had a cockney accent. Which I don’t.) Scrivener is a program founded by writers for writers to supply all the tools needed for fiction writing.

I went through the Scrivener tutorial and also watched a couple YouTube video tutorials and decided I was as ready as I was ever going to be, so I started importing stories from my blog onto Scrivener and will plan to do most of my writing from there from now on.

But after spending hours trying to learn how to use Scrivener, I don’t have a single new story to share with you. I’ve gotten to the point with The Martin Chronicles that I need to spend some time thinking and planning about where it’s going next. It started out rather off-the-cuff and I hadn’t intended to keep going with it, but the story kept going in spite of me. That kind of momentum can’t be ignored, right?

My Scrivener app now has four projects in the works:

• The Martin Chronicles
• Freddy Stories
• Tales of Fig Newton
• Stand-Alone Stories

Well, I can’t just leave you without a story, so how about this one:

A Story of Two People and Their Long-Neglected Bicycles
Once upon a time, a very recent time – in fact, today time – an older couple decided to see if riding a bike after a long hiatus is really like riding a bike. When I say “older,” you should not be imagining an ancient couple, all hunched over with white hair and a million age spots. Nor should you be imagining a medium-ish older couple with bad hips and querulous digestion problems. No, this is an old couple just on the young spectrum of old – still sound in mind and body, but with some aches and infirmities looming on the horizon and well into the golden colonoscopy years. Got it?

Now, where was I? The bikes, having been recently tuned up were raring to go. The husband and wife could hear the kickstands pawing at the cement floor in the garage. It was a nice day, albeit rather windy, so off they went, heeding the call of the wild bicycles. In a very gracious providence, the first leg of the journey was downhill. If they hadn’t been on the old-ish side, the couple (at least the wife) might have let out a hearty “Wheeee!” As it was, only a few minutes went by after hitting the flatlands when the not-quite-elderly woman noticed that her legs were complaining. Yes, in the universal language of the body, those legs were murmuring and moaning something like, “Hey, we’re not used to this! You’re trying to use muscles that have been on stand-by for some time now. Ease up!”

They kept up a steady patter of this sort until the circuit was complete and the bikes were back in the garage. And how did the husband fare, you might ask? You’ll have to ask him, but suffice it to say that he reached the garage first and didn’t seem to be at all diminished by the experience. Let the storyteller hasten to add, however, that this fellow is a full two years younger than his bride. This probably explains everything.

This has been Not-Quite-Fiction Friday with the Not-Quite-Elderly Lynniebee.

Blessings on your Easter weekend. It has to be said:
He is risen.
He is risen, indeed!

I’ll probably be limping around tomorrow with sore legs – why should I bother deleting this?

I was bringing our trash and recycling down to the curb on Wednesday morning at 7:00 a.m. and got distracted by the sky and the clouds, all pinking up with the morning sun. New mornings come every morning and so do the Lord’s lovingkindnesses and compassions. His Word says so and I believe it.

The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease,
For His compassions never fail.
They are new every morning.
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Lamentations 3:22-23

A sky like this makes it easy to believe.

Hallelujah!

I’ll probably be enjoying another beautiful sunrise tomorrow morning while deleting this.

I’ve been struggling through the Watercolor Trip to Italy book, having only done four lessons in four months. On a whim, I checked to see if anyone on YouTube had put out some tutorials for the lessons in this book. Praise be to God – Sarah Newbury Art came through for me! It made all the difference watching someone else working on these, seeing the techniques she used and the thought process as she narrated her way through the lesson. I wish she had done all 16 lessons, but at least she did the first eight. I washed out my ceramic palette, set up my 12 colors in a different place and got ready to start Lesson 5, newly inspired.

Here’s how mine turned out (attempt #1 is on the left):

I’ve had a hard time getting the intensity of color the same as the original example. You’d think the second attempt would have improved, but I like the first one better.

I was so enthused about the process that I went right ahead and watched Lesson 6 and then worked on it:

The first attempt is on the top:

Once again, the colors aren’t quite as intense, but no matter – I feel like I’m finally starting to pick up speed on this. There are lots of things that I see room for improvement on (like the wall on the left around the window – awkward!) but on the whole, it’s starting to feel a little more intuitive to me. Maybe by the time I get to Lesson 9, I’ll have more confidence and won’t feel so abandoned by my new tutor, Sarah Newbury.

In other watercolor news, I’ve been working on some simple watercolor illustrations for the Freddy story. I don’t feel ready for prime time yet.

Good old Freddy!

I’ll probably wash out this blog post palette in the morning.

I decided to re-read Pinocchio, a book given to me by my parents as a Christmas gift when I was eight years old before Disney made it into a movie. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen the Disney movie, but it had a whole different feel to it than the book. Here are a few items of interest from the book.

1. Geppetto starts off by having a knock-down drag-out fight with Mastro Cherry, the original owner of the block of wood that was to become Pinocchio.

2. Even as a block of wood, Pinocchio was rebellious. As soon as his mouth was carved out, he was smarting off. As soon as his foot was carved, he kicked Geppetto.

3. Remember Jiminy Cricket, the cheerful singing cricket from the movie? He was supposed to be Pinocchio’s conscience. In the book, he doesn’t get a name other than “Talking Cricket.” The first time he tries to dole out advice to young Pinocchio (freshly carved), Pinocchio throws a block of wood at him and kills him. Disney left that part out.

4. Pinocchio’s famous nose only grows twice throughout the entire book – hardly worth mentioning!

5. A lot of terrible things happen to Pinocchio as a result of him being a bad boy making bad decisions. He is cheated out of money, attacked by assassins, hung from a tree until he’s almost dead (which is tricky for a block of wood), thrown into jail for being stolen from, kept as a watchdog, turned into a donkey because of his laziness, sold to a circus, thrown in the ocean to drown, and swallowed by a giant shark. It’s like reading a novel-length Grimm’s fairy tale.

6. At some point when Pinocchio is starving, a pigeon tells him “Hunger is the best sauce.” What?!!!?!! I used to say that to my kids all the time! Is this where I got it?

I got a late start on this and now it’s time for bed. Next I plan to revisit the book “Bambi,” which I also read before Disney got ahold of it. I’ll give you my report.

Good night, friends!

I’ll probably…zzzzzzz

Yesterday was Palm Sunday. There was a festive spirit in the air as we stepped into the church building and saw 30 or so children lined up with palm branches in their hands, all talking at once. Palm Sunday commemorates the Triumphal Entry of Jesus into Jerusalem on a donkey shortly before the crucifixion and resurrection.

And a very great multitude spread their clothes on the road; others cut down branches from the trees and spread them on the road. Then the multitudes who went before and those who followed cried out, saying “Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest!”
Matthew 21:8-9

There was something so powerful and sweet in seeing these children holding the palm branches, ready to re-enact the homage of the multitudes, passing out palm branches to some of us older multitudes as we came into the church. This was a big deal, a big day – and they knew it. Bless them for their contagious excitement!

The triumph of Jesus’ entry into Jerusalem was only temporarily overshadowed by the tragedy of the cross. The cries of “Hosanna” were only temporarily superseded by cries of “Crucify Him!” The palm branches were only temporarily replaced by a crown of thorns. From Triumph to Tragedy to Triumph again – all in one week.

Take up your palm branches and give homage to Jesus Christ, the Son of David.

Hosanna in the highest!

I’ll probably delete this, but you shouldn’t.

Fig Newton wanted to see the world from his boat. He didn’t know what that meant and he didn’t care. Let someone else fret the details, he thought – my business is to get the boat in the water and let the river carry me where it will.

This abandonment to the water gave him plenty of time for thinking. He missed his friend Lucy and decided to name his boat “The Lucky Lucy” in her honor. Having taken care of that order of business, his froggy thoughts moved toward the adventure before him. Questions floated by, some drifting lazily, others as if propelled by strong currents. He made a list.

1. How will I know when it’s time to turn back toward home? This question surprised him. He hadn’t realized that having a place called “home” to which he could return was an important part of the journey. He dismissed this question momentarily. It’s not very practical to start out at the end.

2. How will I decide where to stop and explore? After all, he reasoned, if I never stop and take a pause, I might miss something important. Or someone important. Well, he thought, I will leave that in the hands of Providence. Fig was a firm believer that things happen for a Reason and that Someone Else was in charge. I’ll know when to stop, he thought.

3. What supplies should I pick up along the way? He thought maybe he should have a bucket in case The Lucky Lucy sprung a leak (may it never be!). An extra oar might be wise, as well. Another coil of rope could come in handy. He didn’t really need food, because he was going to eat what a frog eats and he thought he could find that anywhere.

4. Will I encounter danger of any kind? This thought gave him a thrill. He spent some time conjuring up in his mind various dangers that might assail him: bad weather, boat trouble, large fish, thieves, predators, unfriendlies of all sorts. He thought it best to be prepared for anything that might test his mettle. And he definitely wanted his mettle to be tested.

He circled back to Question 1 and spent some time on it. Eventually, he decided that he would make a list of 10 things that he wanted to see and/or experience before turning back. He’d do that soon. No need to rush. Some things are meant to be put off.

All this thinking made him hungry. He pulled his boat over to a round, flat stone off the river a ways. It was nice that his boat was so small and he was so strong. He felt a little puffed up about that. He did some hunting and found an assortment of tasty spiders and a few little butterflies for dessert. He sat by the boat supremely relaxed and closed his froggy eyes for a little rest. Ahh, this was the life.

“What have we here? A loud, deep voice woke him up.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I’ve been wanting to continue with Fig’s story, but like him, I found myself thinking “No need to rush. Some things are meant to be put off.” Eventually, he was insistent so here is the next installment. And just for fun, it ends on a cliff hanger!!!

Fig Newton Part 1

Fig Newton Part 3

I’ll probably delete this in the morning. No need to rush…

Often when I wander outside with my camera, I don’t know what I’m looking for. It’s like going gift shopping for someone without any actual gift ideas – nothing more than “I’ll know it when I find it.” I just know there’s a gift out there somewhere, something that catches my eye and beckons me over. I take lots of photos and when I get back, I rummage through them and jettison the stuff that seemed photo-worthy but upon closer inspection, wasn’t. I have lots of “ooh” moments that later turn into “what was I thinking when I took that one?”

I kept these two. “Ooh” became “Ahh.”

Honestly, there’s nothing terribly special about these photos except how they speak to me. I love the close-up, the narrow focal range, the juxtaposition of colors, the sharpness and precision of the cedar branch contrasted with the amorphous snow, the slow drip of melting ice arrested by colder temperatures, waiting to resume… Everything is so beautiful to me.

I went shopping for a gift, paid nothing, and got everything.

“Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Jesus Christ to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.”
Ephesians 3:20-21 NKJV

I’ll probably delete this in the morning while out gift shopping with my camera.

Lesson 4 in Watercolor Italy:

This one gave me an opportunity to try a new technique using paraffin wax to create areas on a painted surface to resist the next layer of paint to go on. It was used on the roof, the side of the building and on the grass. First attempt:

I realized that I’d been a little too hesitant in the application of the wax on the building. And by the way, I should point out that the drawing is sketched onto the watercolor paper and all I do is basically paint in between the lines. I decided not to do any outlining on this painting. On to the next attempt:

I did the sky and the trees a little differently, added more wax to the roof and the side of the building an also lightened up the grassy area. I think the trees look like amorphous monsters. Have you ever seen the movie “The Blob?” You could almost imagine that those green things are creeping up on the building, about to engulf it and eat it. That’s my weird imagination for you. I liked the wax, though – pretty nifty technique.

I wanted to take my sketches of Freddy and make them into paintings but it didn’t happen this week.

Watercolor Wednesday has left the building.

I’ll probably delete this in the morning unless The Blobby Trees get to it first.

Yesterday was a lost day. I was prepping for a certain procedure which shall remain nameless (hint: involved clear liquids and lots of trips to the bathroom) and amidst all of that sheer funnery, the blog post withered away like a little cloud on a hot summer day.

I had trouble sleeping last night, so I dipped into my usual bag of tricks for achieving that blissful state. No, I don’t count sheep, but most of my techniques amount to about the same thing. It’s all about focusing the mind on something, ideally something repetitive and as mindless as counting sheep. In no particular order, here’s what I keep in my Need-To-Sleep Satchel:

1. Counting backwards from 100 to 1, breathing in and out very slowly as I count. That’s often surprisingly effective, working before I even get back to 75 or so. But sometimes just as I start getting a little woozy with sleep, something jogs me back into being fully awake. I either pick up where I left off, or move onto something else.

2. Another breathing technique that I read about some years ago: breathe in slowly through your nose while counting to 4. Hold it for 7 seconds and then breathe out through your mouth for 8 seconds. The first time I tried that I was pretty skeptical – it seemed kind of gimmicky and stupid…and then I fell asleep. Apparently, there’s an actual physiological thing that happens. And yet, this doesn’t always work either.

3. Scripture memory review. Win, win! I have a bunch of verses memorized that I review regularly and I might start pulling those out of the hat when I’m struggling to focus my mind on something. It’s not necessarily mindless, but it does fall back on something fairly rote, so maybe that’s why it can be effective sometimes.

4. Prayers for others. How sad that this should be a snoozer, but there’s no denying that sometimes when I fire up the prayer list, it sends me off into slumberland.

5. Here’s a relatively new one: I mentally narrate through the last show or movie we watched. It’s weird, but that sometimes does the trick. I start out as if I’m reading the script: “When the movie began, the narrator was talking about people trying to escape Europe during WWII by fleeing to America and how one of the routes out to safety was through Casablanca. We are looking at a map and then it switches to a scene in Casablanca…”. I think this one works if I’m trying to get my mind off of something else that’s keeping me awake.

Last night I debuted a brand new technique. I’m not sure how effective it can be, but it was kind of fun. Do you remember a game called “Grandma’s Suitcase” or “Grandma’s Attic?” We used to play that one in the car. Each person contributes something that they found in Grandma’s Suitcase or Attic and it goes through the alphabet, like so:

“I went up to Grandma’s Attic and found an Awful Alligator.” The next person has to start with the Awful Alligator and add something else, like “Brainy Beagle.” Each person has to remember all of the items that came before, always starting at the beginning. It might have been too fun for me:
Awful Alligator
Brainy Beagle
Cheerful Cheetah
Domineering Dingo
Ersatz Eagle
Flabbergasted Flamingo
Grabby Gorilla
Humble Hummingbird
Ignoble Iguana

I got stuck on “K” – something Koala, but I couldn’t think of a good adjective that started with K.

Ah well, I did get a couple hours of sleep, but with all the interruptions (aforementioned visits to the bathroom), I finally gave up and came downstairs to read.

I had an early appointment, fortunately – “I’ve been through the worst of it and it will all be over soon,” I said to myself after we got to the center Bright and Early. The nurse had gotten me almost ready to go and was about to insert the IV into my arm when she was called out of the room. She came back in with the news that the doctor had just called in sick. I said cheerfully, “That’s awkward!” But inwardly, I was going through something like this:

While this isn’t a procedure one looks forward to, it’s DEFINITELY one that you don’t want to have to do the prep for twice. She ducked out again while I grappled with the various stages of grieving. By the time she came back in, I had leaned into the sovereignty of God and was ready for Plan B, come what may. It turned out that another doctor was willing to squeeze me into his day and he’d do my procedure first.

And lo, it came to pass. That’s how my day has been. How about yours?

I’ll probably delete this in the morning after getting a good night’s sleep, hallelujah!

Dear Bucky,
First of all, congratulations on Bucky Jr. taking his first steps. Can an illustrious career as a quarterback be far behind? It’s been too long since I’ve seen him and I don’t want it to go so long that he’s growing facial hair the next time we meet and he has to say, “Uncle Marty? I never knew you…” It seems really hard for you and Suzanne to get away, so how about if I take a weekend off soon to come down? It’ll be a short visit, but better than nothing.

Now, to get you caught up on the intrigue at HC, here’s the next installment. Oh, by the way, I appreciated your contributions for the BOII. My favorite one was about boots and slippers: “If slippers look like boots, can you call them ‘sloops?’ If boots look like slippers, can you call them ‘blippers?'” I was inspired to write a little poem based on that profound thought – I’ll put it at the end of this email for your enjoyment.

Your fine contributions notwithstanding, I decided I must rise or fall with the BOII on my own, so after careful consideration, I wrote the following on a slip of paper and put it in the Interesting Ideas file:

“Using a computer is like making a bargain with the devil: everything goes well until it doesn’t, and then there’s hell to pay.”

I thought this hit notes of humor, wit, and appeal to the common man. Not very controversial, but a good starting point for a conversation. Ideal, right?

I hadn’t been back at my desk for 5 minutes when a reply came in on my email from BOII:

Mr. Anderson,

Please do us the courtesy of looking up the word “interesting” in your dictionary. We’ll give you one more chance.

Cordially,

The Bureau of INTERESTING Ideas

I had various reactions to this dismissive missive. First, how did they get back to me so soon? I had been watching and no one went back to the file section that I could tell. Second, calling me Mr. Anderson was definitely a frosty beginning – a strict formality after the previous email warmly addressing me as “Martin.” Third, how dare they impugn my ability to be interesting! I was under the impression this was going to be a fun game, but the gloves are off now. Like Calvin of “Calvin and Hobbes,” I am rubbing my hands together with an “I shall dominate the world” evil smile on my face, planning my next move.

In spite of all my bluster, I’m actually really intrigued by the whole situation. I’m not so sure it’s all part of a practical joke anymore. What if there’s something nefarious about the BOII after all? I’ve been reading a suspenseful and somewhat disturbing book in the evenings called Murder Most Severe, and I think it’s getting in my head – ha ha. I’m inclined to submit another idea just to see where this leads. What do you think?

On that note, I’m off to the fridge to get a beer and relax, so I can give some thought to the next submission to the BOII. I’m skipping the book reading tonight, though.

Hey, throw a football pass to BJ for me – we can’t start too soon with teaching him some skills. Also, tell Suzanne that the bachelor’s life is one of loneliness and pathetic convenience food, in order to prompt her to make some of her stellar meals for me out of sheer pity.

Martin

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Previously:
https://lynniebeemuseoday.wordpress.com/2021/02/05/friday-february-5-2021-dear-bucky/
https://lynniebeemuseoday.wordpress.com/2021/02/19/friday-february-19-2021-interesting-ideas/

I wrote the sloops and blippers doggerel years ago and wanted to find a way to use it.

While we were visiting our son and his family recently, I was reading a book called Murder Must Advertise. He glanced at it and mis-read it as Murder Most Severe, which we all found very amusing, so I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to insert that into this story.

I’ve decided to call this The Martin Chronicles, and didn’t realize until after writing it down that it’s pretty close to The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury. Let’s pretend I did that on purpose. It was probably a subconscious imitation anyway.

Thanks for following along – I’d love any constructive feedback that you have.

I’ll probably delete this in the morning, especially if I receive a dismissive missive.

Lots of artsy things happened here in the last week! After I wrote the story about Freddy, I decided to try doing illustrations for it. I looked on Pinterest for drawings of little children to use as a guide and found some really charming ones by Jane Massey. They’re very sweet and simple -just what I was looking for. Using her drawings as an example, I started out with some sketches of mostly little girls and made four of them into paintings. Some of them turned out better than others, as you will see.

Oh, dear. I forgot that I was going to do the outline of the face with pen and tried using the paintbrush. Not a good idea. I learned from that and went on to the rest.

Proportions were weird – the face is unnaturally large and wide, I think.

I like her! Reminds me of our granddaughter. Coincidence? I think not!!! 🙂

Next, I decided to try some sketches for Freddie’s story. Trying to draw one character consistently in different poses doing different things gives you an appreciation for professional book illustrators. Basically I ended up with four Freddies, all of whom look different. It was fun anyway.

I had drawn some little horns on Freddy the Dragon, but they looked kind of devilish rather than dragonish, so I erased them. What do you think? Should I put them back in?

Last and kind of least, I worked on Lesson 3 in the Waercolor Italy book.

The first attempt is on the left. I like the intensity of the orange in the background and on the lamps, but the general wash in the sky is very inconsistent and splotchy looking. I went with using outlines – that’s definitely a style thing for me. Lots of room for improvement! I’m getting more comfortable with the process, though.

Thanks for coming along with me on this watercolor journey!

I’ll probably delete or add back in some dragon horns in the morning, depending on your Very Important Feedback. Freddy is waiting to see how it turns out.