Category: Spiritual Musings

Tuesday, July 28, 2026 Forgetting How to Walk

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I have to admit that I did not see this coming when I had total knee replacement surgery: I have, apparently, forgotten how to walk. I noticed it as I started walking again when the knee was stronger. My gait felt awkward and my opposite hip hurt. I chalked it up to adjusting to the new knee. A thought surfaced: what if this is the new normal? I prayed about it and tucked it away.

Whate’er my God ordains is right
His holy will abideth

When you take a walk, you don’t usually think about the action of walking, anymore than you think about breathing. Your legs know what to do and everything else follows. It’s like riding a bike, right? You are in automatic mode and are free to converse, think, look around, take photos. But now I was analyzing every step. Heel, toe, heel toe…that’s right. But that inside pain on the upper right thigh – did I pull a muscle? And the pain on the outside of the hip? What’s that about? My six-month post-surgery appointment was coming up.

I will be still whate’er He does
And follow where He guideth

The Physician’s Assistant gave me a glowing report concerning my knee: everything is healing up as it should and the bend is excellent. You wouldn’t think you could be proud of being able to bend your knee well, but think again. Now, how about this hip pain when I walk? She asked a few questions, did some manipulations and said, “Well, sometimes this can be just an adjustment to walking with a good knee again as you unlearn the way you were compensating for the bad knee before.” Yay! “But in your case, I think it looks more like hip arthritis, which might not be helped by therapy. Good news, though – a hip replacement surgery is much easier to recover from than knee replacement surgery!” Oh. “Let’s set up another appointment in a month just in case the therapy hasn’t helped and we want to look at some options.” All righty then!

He is my God, though dark my road
He holds me that I shall not fall

I gave birth to twins many years ago, an emergency C-section at 33 weeks. Twin blessings! But the delivery was filled with tension and the recovery was difficult. Our oldest son, who was five years old, was so thrilled with having twin brothers that he suggested that I should have triplets next. You see where I’m going here. I was not prepared to start thinking about another replacement surgery in the middle of recovering from the knee surgery. But as I was grappling with this new and unwelcome vista before me, the words of a hymn came floating into my head “Whate’er my God ordains is right.” Oh, my friends, it makes all the difference in the world to leave it all to Him who knows and loves me best. He is the perfect Father; I have complete confidence that His plan, whatever it is, is for my good and His glory.

And so to Him, I leave it all
And so to Him, I leave it all

I’ll probably heel/toe this post to the delete button in the morning.

Monday, June 8, 2026 The World and They That Dwell Therein

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The earth is the LORD’S, and the fulness thereof;

The world, and they that dwell therein.

Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lifted up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.

Who is this King of glory? The LORD, strong and mighty, the LORD, mighty in battle.

Lift up your heads, O ye gates..and the King of glory shall come in.

Who is this King of glory? The LORD of hosts, he is the King of glory. Selah.

When your garden and the creatures who pass through it speak the psalms to you.

I think it’s bedtime; I shall dream of deleting this in the morning.

Monday, April 13, 2026 The Stories We Tell Ourselves

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I love to tell stories. As soon as something happens to me or if I witness something, I am inwardly figuring out how to narrate it as a story. Doesn’t everyone do this?

But of late, I’ve realized that most of the stories I tell myself about the unknown are terrible. The Holy Spirit has been nudging me to recognize this. It’s been a lifelong habit, so thoroughly ingrained that it feels a part of my skin.

Travel plans coming up? It’ll probably be the last trip we take. Some disaster on the road will take our lives.

Medical appointment? There’s always a chance that it’s cancer. Or some other awful disease.

Concern about a loved one? Worst case scenarios (WCS) multiply almost without effort.

Could it go wrong? It will go wrong.

Someone didn’t reply to my text? I might have offended them. Or perhaps something horrible happened to them.

I’ve gotten better about catching WCS’s before I’m planning funerals in my head. Yet it wasn’t until I began to see these as bad stories that I started identifying them right away for what they are. As soon as one of these obnoxious thoughts worms its way into my brain, I call it out: “That’s a bad story and I will not tell it. I repent of it.”

It requires repentance because my bad stories also tell something about the way I view God and the stories He tells. Unlike me, God is a perfect story teller. If the “worst” happens, it’s part of some good story that He’s telling, even if I can’t see it. (One need look no further than Christ’s crucifixion and resurrection for proof.) Until and unless it happens, I’m just making stuff up and letting it scare me, and making the Lord out to be a constant purveyor of doom in the process. I’ve been at this a long time and I can assure you that I’ve been a very poor “prophet.” None of the things I’ve predicted have come to pass. And the hard providences that the Lord has sent my way weren’t things I predicted anyway.

So, I’m putting the new message on repeat: “That’s a bad story and I will not tell it. I repent of it.”

Worst Case Blog Scenario: I’ll have to delete this in the morning.

Friday, January 16, 2026 The City on a Hill

~ Foodiness ~ 4 Comments

Long ago, a simpleton named Simon was walking along a dusty, deserted road and saw a small city up ahead on a hill. The entrance was at the highest part of the hill, so it was a bit of a slog to get there. But Simon needed a place to stay for the night and it was the only town in sight.

At last, Simon saw the city gates. Two women, identical twins, stood at the entrance. They called out simultaneously, “Whoever is simple, turn in here!” It was odd – their voices saying the same thing should have had a pleasing unity, but instead the sound was discordant. The one on the left beckoned to Simon, saying, “Don’t listen to my sister. She will only tell you lies.” The one on the right laughed and replied, “The liar accuses me of lying.” Turning to Simon she said, “Listen and think for yourself, esteemed visitor.”

The one on the left spoke again. “There are two doors into this city. We are the doorkeepers. You may only enter by one door, mine or my sister’s. Pay heed, for the wrong choice will bring you much sorrow.”

Simon asked, “How will I know which door to enter?”

The twin on the right answered, “You must listen to our invitations. It is not complicated. My sister is already trying to frighten you, but I can tell that you are not the kind of person to be easily frightened.”

The woman on the left addressed Simon, “You are simple, you lack understanding, but I can help you. Won’t you listen to me?”

Simon the simpleton was a little put off by being called simple and without understanding (there’s a reason he was known as a simpleton, after all.)

The woman on the right called out, “Sister, you said a true word there. This fellow is simple, he lacks understanding. But he’s also clearly more attuned to my voice than yours.” To him, she said, “Come closer and I will tell you what you want to hear.”

But Simon decided he should listen to both invitations to be fair. He turned to the left and gestured for her to begin.

“I have prepared a meal for you, the best meat is on my plate, roasted to perfection. See what bread I have baked. It is made from golden grains that drank sunshine all the day long. I have wine for you to drink, mixed with fruit and spices. It is a meal that will satisfy you and give you life.”

It is a good speech, one that Simon wished he could have paid complete attention to, but while she was speaking, her twin was banging on old pots and making a clamor. Still, he got enough to know that the invitation was to a meal, and it reminded him that he was very hungry. He turned to the right to hear the other invitation.

“My sister wants to fill you up with her simple food. Don’t you know that it’s cruel to kill animals to eat their meat? How could you possibly enjoy that? Doesn’t wine dull your senses? Be careful – there’s trickery on her plate! And where’s the excitement in such fare as she has to offer? She thinks to satisfy you with wine, but I know of a well that has the clearest, purest water which is only fit for kings. It would be simplicity itself for you and I to steal some of that, and the thrill of stealing it would make it sweeter than wine. As for bread…”

And here she gestured for Simon to come closer, whereupon she whispered in his ear. “I have bread that is best eaten in secret, if you know what I mean.” A broad wink and a smile accompanied that last part and Simon flushed with pleasure.

Ah, what a choice. Each sister had spoken to Simon’s simple heart. There was something in the invitation from the right, however, that had begun to entice Simon’s mind and fill his senses. Almost without thinking, he began to walk toward her door, but at the last moment, he looked over to the other sister and saw a look on her face that stopped him. There was light, love and compassion shining from her eyes. Simon was completely undone and suddenly aware that he had been guilty of the most preposterous foolishness.

The sister on the right began her clamor with banging on pots again, but it was too late. Simon walked toward the door on the left and asked, “Might I know your name, fair lady?”

“You may. I am called Wisdom and my sister is Folly. Had you entered her door, you would have joined the company of the dead in hell. Go through my door where your days will be multiplied and years of life will be added to you.” She held the door open for him.

Simon accepted the invitation and walked into the light.

Proverbs Chapter 9

This simple post will be deleted in the morning.

Tuesday, December 9, 2025 Commonplace Book: A Lovely Light

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Unwrapped gifts are stacked in a corner, while unkempt rolls of wrapping paper lounge carelessly on the couch. The two groups are destined to meet. And soon.

But you didn’t come here for my pithy observations. Let’s attend to the business of reading this week’s quotes in my book.

Christians have nothing to be smug about;
we are not righteous people trying to correct the unrighteous.
Just one beggar telling another beggar
where to find bread.
R.C. Sproul

And if you don’t know where to find the bread of life, crack open that dusty old Bible that lies forgotten on your shelf, turn to the Gospel of John chapter 6, and commence eating.

It was only a sunny smile
and little it cost in giving,
but like morning light
it scattered the night
and made the day worth living.
F. Scott Fitzgerald

The power of a sunny smile to vanquish the darkness in somebody else’s day.

We do not draw people to Christ by loudly discrediting what they believe, by telling them how wrong they are and how right we are, but by showing them a light that is so lovely that they want with all their hearts to know the source of it.
Madeleine L’Engle

Ponder that one for a minute or so with me.

Cultivate the holy habit
of seeing the hand of God
in everything that happens to you.
Arthur W. Pink

Cultivating is a work of hoes, dirt, sweat and calluses. But in the end, ah, what a garden you have.

Be thankful for the thorns and thistles
which keep you from being in love with this world.
Charles Spurgeon

I’ll probably loudly discredit this post in the morning.

Tuesday, November 11, 2025 Quote Round-up: Drink It Up

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Here we are again, meeting over some thought-provoking quotes that I’ve been copying in my Commonplace Book. May you find encouragement along the way.

If God has made your cup sweet,
Drink it with grace;
If He has made it bitter,
Drink it in communion with Him.
Oswald Chambers

(Stock photo, not one of mine)

God is good all the time. All the time, God is good. Drink it up.

If anything crosses your will,
see in it a chance to die.
Amy Carmichael

You can tell that these saints of old knew what it was to face affliction. May we follow in their train.

I walked a mile with Pleasure;
She chatted all the way;
But left me none the wiser
For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And ne’er a word said she;
But oh! The things I learned from her,
When Sorrow walked with me.
Robert Browning Hamilton

The book Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard is an old favorite of mine. The main character, Much-Afraid, is given two companions on her journey to the High Places, Sorrow and Suffering. She recoils from them and dreads taking their hands at first, but soon comes to appreciate their companionship. This little poem recalled that to my mind.

And to end on a lighter note, here’s a quote from John Adams that is all too apropos even all these years later:

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that
one useless man is a shame,
two is a law firm,
and three or more is a congress.
John Adams

Ha ha! That’s what you call a trenchant observation!

Driving across Wyoming at sunset

One useless post is a shame that should be deleted in the morning.

Monday, October 20, 2025 The Secret Life of Lynniebee

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Have you ever seen the 2013 movie “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty”? Walter Mitty is a single man in his early 40’s living an uneventful life in which he takes few risks. This is what he is on the outside, but his inner life is rich with stories in which he jumps off a bridge to save a dog from a burning building, or in which he is a rugged explorer in arctic regions, or again in which he responds with wit, action, and bravery when he is bullied by his new boss at Life Magazine. This secret life of his causes him to zone out from his real life, as he gets caught up in these fantasies which demonstrate the kind of person he would like to be. Things happen that propel Walter to start living a life of risk-taking and adventure, but no spoilers from me. We’ve watched this movie so many times – it never gets old. Highly recommend!

In a certain sense we all have secret lives, the realm of our thought lives. And what a strange world it can be sometimes. I have been known to zone out with people while entertaining some sort of inner story or conversation. Like Walter Mitty, I also sometimes envision vignettes in which I am helping someone, making myself notable in some way to others, i.e. creating images that we call “delusions of grandeur.” In the secret life of Lynniebee, I am calm, confident and articulate when faced with an adversarial conversation. In the secret life of Lynniebee, I share the gospel easily and effectively with others.

But also in the secret life of Lynniebee, I am prone to creating whole scenarios out of my anxieties and dwelling on them as if they were real. I’ve been known to blow a health issue so far out of proportion that I’ve imagined my own funeral. In the secret life of Lynniebee, I am always justified when I’m angry. My thought life can become like a stampeding herd of dangerous cattle, out of control. What can you do when your inner life has gone wild?

There’s a reason why we are told to take every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. The apostle Paul tells us exactly how to corral these wild beasts and tame them. “Finally brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence or anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on those things.” Philippians 4:8. I have learned to get a lasso out whenever I detect an impending stampede. The first lasso I throw out is always the question “Is it true?” You wouldn’t believe how many wild things I’ve taken captive with that one question. But all those other considerations make good lassos too.

The secret life of Lynniebee isn’t a secret to God. One of my favorite verses is “Search me, O God, and know my heart. Try me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.” Psalm 139:23-24. He knows me. He knows my heart. He knows my anxious thoughts. And in spite of all that, He loves me enough to root out those things that are hurtful and then lead me in the everlasting way.

Thanks be to God!

I’ll probably pick some banana peppers and delete this in the morning.

Monday, September 22, 2025 Senescence

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The grass withers,
The flower fades…
But the word of our God
Stands forever.
Isaiah 40:8

Perhaps that’s what we should ponder when autumn comes to carry summer away. There is an ache in the senescence of the garden, but it was never meant to last forever.

God’s word is a flower that never fades. It is a green grass that never withers. Such is our hope.

I’ll probably delete this senescent post in the morning.

Tuesday, May 27, 2025 Sowing Light

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“Light is sown for the righteous,
And gladness for the upright in heart.”
Psalm 97:11

I read that recently and was struck by it. If light is a seed that is sown for us, what will be the plant? What will be the flower? What will be the fruit? I love the picture of God sowing seeds of light for us, especially knowing that ultimately the Lamb of God is our light, replacing the sun and the moon (Revelation 21:23). “In Him was life, and the life was the light of men.” (John 1:4).

And He also sows gladness for us. There will be a harvest of gladness, no matter how many trials afflict our gardens.

It also occurs to me what an interesting analogy this is. Seeds that are sown are buried first. Sown things must die in darkness in order to flourish and grow in the light. “Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. (John12:24.

Jesus is the light that was sown for us, who died in dark soil that we may enjoy the harvest of His everlasting light.

Things to ponder, musings to mull over…

I’ll probably delete this in the morning.

Tuesday, May 20, 2025 Provenance and Providence

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This bunny cup was given to me when I was born. At some point in my adult life, my mother gave it to me, and it has stayed in the shadows for all these years. Not in literal shadows, but the fact of its existence has never prompted any thought in my brain whatsoever. Clearly I’ve been packing it and moving it with us when we’ve moved, right? It’s been on a shelf collecting dust which I have not even bothered to clean.

Our daughter is expecting a baby, their first, and when I realized I’d be able to go to the baby shower, I was looking around for something old of mine to give her, in addition to other things. The bunny cup waved a metaphorical hand to get my attention and just like that, I saw it. How charming! I looked on the bottom of it and saw that it was signed “B ‘58.” No longer a random kitschy item, this had true provenance. I could tell by the signature that the bunny cup had been lovingly painted for me by one of my two aunts, both of whom had names beginning with the letter B. Which one? I couldn’t tell, but decided it had to have been the older “B,” since I knew she was the artsy type.

I cleaned it off and gift-wrapped it, preparing it for its new home out West. On the way out there, I got an unexpected email from one of my cousins, a son of the younger “B.” He attached several photos of his mother’s pottery, a topic we’d apparently touched on at some point and which I had forgotten. Lo and behold, there it was, her signature on the bottom of several pieces, the very same signature that was on the bunny cup. A small thing, but this was True Providence. Here was an item I hadn’t thought about or cared about for decades and almost the very minute I began wondering who made it for me, the answer came in an unprompted email. Some would see this as an unremarkable coincidence, but I see it as a kindness of the Lord’s, an attention to little details. What I put in the shadows, He brings to light.

I’ll probably delete this in the morning, if I can find it among the shadows.